Let’s talk about Mother’s Day. Why not? My heart is raw and hopeful and hurting all at the same time.
I’ve always felt a little “meh” about Mother’s (and Father’s Day). Don’t get me wrong, it’s a wonderful time to celebrate mothers and fathers, but just like my feelings towards Valentine’s Day and how it’s deemed as a day to celebrate love, I feel like you should be celebrating mothers and fathers every day of the year. No?
In any case, my “meh” feelings have greatly intensified this year.
Mother’s Day will obviously be a different day for me now and moving forward, and to be honest, I’m not looking forward to it, for myself. I look forward to celebrating by mom and my mom-in-law, but I’m not looking forward to it for me.
Mother’s day is always on Sundays. I’ve always disliked when in church, they do some kind of visual recognition of mothers, like the pastor saying “can all the moms present please stand up so we can acknowledge and appreciate you with applause?” or when people have flowers to hand out to moms. Well what about moms who don’t have visual proof that they are mothers, but rather invisible, emotional longings and hurts of what could have been? Are they allowed to stand? Are they obliged to stand? Are they allowed to reach out their hands to receive a flower? They are moms, if for the mere fact that they carried a child in their womb or in their arms. But will others perceive them that way?
I just really do not like Mother’s Day right now. I’m sure my feelings will change if God ever grants us living children in the future, but for right now, I’m thankful we won’t be attending church that day.
To be a mom who lost their baby in a swarm of moms being celebrated… or to be a child who has lost their mom in a mass of people celebrating their moms…it’s too much. My heart is too raw. I can’t.